The Faith We Witness as Children Stays With Us

We observed Ryan’s 40th Day Memorial Service, celebrating his life with family, friends, and well-wishers.

A highly accomplished woman, whom I’ve looked up to since a child, came to me at the end and told me how well I spoke. How my faith was so inspiring and humbling!

I told her, “Ma’am! You talk about my faith being an inspiration. I have a story to share. In your pre-retirement and busiest days, you would come to church every Sunday at 6pm. You still do, but back then, when your schedule was packed, you would show up for God every Sunday, no matter what. I have always looked up to you as a child. I often quoted your example to my husband and child.”

It felt like a circle had been completed. From being that child who looked up to her inspiration for her dauntless faith to her inspiration telling her that her faith was inspirational and humbling.

The Seed of Faith

When I look back to the very beginning, I know where the seed of my faith first sprouted. It was during one of my loneliest, yet most enriching phases of my life: My boarding school days in Kerala.

The school, Sobhana High School in Kothamangalam, was founded by Fr. John Matheiken, a Catholic priest and my paternal granduncle who I have the privilege and honour of calling, ‘Ichachan’. 

Ichachan was the only child born into a rich, aristocratic family. However, he felt a strong calling to become a priest and serve society, rather than chasing materialistic pursuits. He built schools, hospitals, and many other social institutions to help the local communities

Every day began with the 6 a.m. Mass in Malayalam and ended with the Rosary with Ichachan in the evening—often under the stars on hot summer nights.

While I missed my family terribly, today I look back on that time with a lot of gratitude. I certainly wouldn’t have had such a solid foundation in my faith if I hadn’t been in such close proximity to Ichachan. He also inspired me with his clear purpose to shun materialistic greed and serve humanity.

I didn’t realise it then, but that seed of faith would become my backbone, carrying me through uncertainty.

Interestingly, I found a lot of similarities in personality between Ichachan and Ryan. Both were handsome, though my granduncle was around 6’1″–6’2″ while Ryan was about 5’7″. Ichachan looked very handsome even in his mid-seventies, with a thick mop of silver hair neatly combed back. Both were sticklers for neatness and punctuality, and highly disciplined. They were also very particular and independent, and they loved good food and travel.

Ryan never got to meet Ichachan, but we got engaged on Ichachan’s birthday. The boarding school was one of the first places I took him to during our first trip together to Kerala. I showed Ryan around all the familiar spots — Ichachan’s room, his engraved grave inside the chapel, the park, the old boarding school rooms, and many more.

I hope Ichachan and Ryan are getting to know each other, having interesting conversations, and a great time together…a happy forever, in the spiritual realm. God bless these two noble, gentle souls always!

Family, Faith, and Foundation

Later, when I came home, I still became a witness to my parents’ faith. Seeing them go through life’s challenges with God as the centre of our lives is a lesson I witness to this day. 

Another sight that is deeply etched in my mind is that of my maternal grandmother, whom we all called “Ammachi,”: The Holy Bible and Rosary by her bedside. For some reason, I always found that image of her deeply inspiring. It is how I will always remember her.

My mum and her sisters are all extremely strong women, each distinct in her own right. They are highly educated, talented, and accomplished working women…some of them the sole breadwinners of their families. Back then, they would drink responsibly (something unheard of for women in those days) whenever they gathered in the privacy of our home. Each one of them is also a God-fearing woman. One thing I find particularly intriguing about them is their perfect blend of masculine and feminine traits. They were all far ahead of their time.

When Strangers Feel Familiar

Sometimes, the greatest lessons in faith come from the most unexpected people and outside the family.  

Our neighbour, a beautiful woman in her thirties lost her husband, a soldier in the Indian Army. She was a Hindu, her husband a Christian, and they have two sons. Her eldest son and I were good friends.

Post her husband’s death, the woman continued to live amicably with her in-laws and two sons. She would also come to church regularly, often alone. I still vividly remember her serene face and red saree after Sunday mass when I greeted her outside the cathedral.

That vision of her outside the cathedral flashed out of nowhere after Ryan passed away. I hadn’t thought of her in all these years, but at this juncture her image—dressed in a red saree with a serene countenance—flashed several times in my mind like a photograph.

I had always been amazed by her countenance. She radiated beauty and peace, and that in turn spoke volumes about her strength without her uttering a word. I’m sure soldiers’ wives and families are prepared for the worst at any time. But this woman seemed untouched and unfazed by the tragedy.

Today, I finally understand her countenance. That kind of unreal strength and resilience can only come from the Divine. 

I was also reminded of Gladys Staines, whose husband, Graham Staines was brutally murdered for his ministry work. Despite her unimaginable grief and the loss of her beloved, her response was Christ-like. She said:

“I have forgiven the killers and have no bitterness, because forgiveness needs healing and our land needs healing from forgiveness. To whomsoever you forgive, their sins will be forgiven.”

It is humanly impossible to respond with such love, forgiveness, and wisdom without divine intercession.

Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, they know not what they do.”

Luke 23:34

These are memories of faith, love, and service that I witnessed in childhood that have left an indelible mark on me. I will also speak of stories of adulthood and how people of varied faiths have inspired me and continue to do so some day.

We All Carry Light Within Us

It felt like a complete circle when my inspiration said my faith was inspirational—and little did she know she was mine while growing up. 

You don’t know who’s watching you…when they might remember you again.

And who knows, simply your recall might play a crucial part, in one of the most challenging times in someone’s life!

It might even soothe them like a balm, if not for providing the answers or a way. 

Isn’t that what they call purpose? All of us carry it within us…knowingly or unknowingly.

This post is a part of Blogchatter A2Z Challenge 2026.