It’s that time of the year again to reflect on the year gone by.
Right away, if there’s one word that’d describe my 2022, it would be gratitude. I remember penning the year-end review exactly last year, this time with a heavy heart.
2021 was a shocker of a year, with the sudden demise of my aunt, who was a maternal figure for us children in the family. She was among the youngest of my mother’s sisters and was barely sixty when she breathed her last.
My mother’s health hit rock bottom in 2021, starting at the beginning of the year with the second wave of COVID-19. The after effects of the pandemic continued to trouble her all year, with her health worsening towards the end of 2021. From speculations that it was long COVID to chronic osteoporosis and more, we were in the dark for the longest time about her condition.
It was around January 2022 when the doctors finally found the cause. My mum had Multiple Myeloma or blood cancer. Never in our wildest nightmares did we think that the cause of her sickness was cancer. I didn’t mention the name of the condition when I had penned last year’s reflections, because the news was yet to sink in fully among us. It took my mother the longest time to accept that she had the condition. It wasn’t until later this year that she told people of her condition – a few months after her chemotherapy was over. From shock to denial to anger to sadness to acceptance and gratitude, my mom has experienced it all.
If 2021 was a tough year, I was prepared for 2022 to be even tougher on the personal front. I knew the only way to we could make through this crisis as a family was to keep hope alive, and rely on the power of prayer. And so, we prayed, sought people’s blessings, and we got to witness the immense love that mom commanded from family and friends. It was indeed touching to see how everyone went out of their way to see that her treatment was successful and comfortable. So many miraculous things that just fell into place at the right time to ensure mom’s good health.
Frankly, all the materialistic achievements and successes mean so little when all you need is love. Having my mum still with me is a miracle, and I couldn’t ask for anything more seriously last year. Nothing else meant as much, either. I ardently wish she puts her health on topmost priority this year and leave all worries and concerns aside. Her health is still fragile, and she’s got a long way to go before becoming stronger.
I intend to spend a lot more time with mum this year. If that means cutting back on work, so be it. If that means losing a few lucrative opportunities, so be it. Somehow, nothing makes more sense at this stage than dialling down on unnecessary, superficial activities and focusing on what and who truly matters in life.
Anyway, let me quickly run through my 2022 for you.
My word for 2022 was “Balance”. After 2020 and 2021, if there was anything I’d learned, it was the importance of having a balance in your life. I’m a natural workaholic, and I realised how pointless it was to live this way during the pandemic. The pandemic completely shifted my perspective about career, especially. My career goals before the pandemic, now suddenly seemed so meaningless and joyless. So, I took a call to switch and steer my career in a whole different direction. I’d also decided I will not be working so hard to the bone anymore. Surely, not to the extent of neglecting health, family, and home. My mum’s cancer happened at around the same time when I was contemplating bringing balance into my life.
Here are some of my baby steps last year in that direction.
Self-care
In 2021, if I crossed 2500 steps, that itself was a huge thing. By 2022, I could clock in 10k steps daily easily. I’m still not there yet with my sleep goals but I’m hoping to improve my sleep hygiene in 2023.
I continued investing in lots of books. I’ve also been spending on fashion. It might sound superficial, but this was a luxury denied during the pandemic. I’d never shopped online for clothes before the pandemic. Now, I think it’s the best way to shop when returns and exchanges are a breeze. You can escape the traffic and crowds.
Passion
I’ve always thought of writing as tedious. Yes, it is, but I’m approaching it differently now. To re-look at writing and make it fun again. So, I’ve been actively writing online and on paper as well.
I wrote a lot last year. There were platforms who wanted me to contribute regularly as a columnist and curator. I was skeptical at the start, given my work, home, and personal commitments. But, I’ve been able to manage it so far. I intend to keep up with the writing flow, and explore more terrains this year.
Work
Professionally, it was a good year again. While I might be slow down on work, it doesn’t mean that it’s any less fruitful. The hard work I’ve put in the last couple of years has earned me an excellent reputation. Almost everyone who’s worked with me still turns to me when they have new projects. Work will always be important, but the trick is to balance it with other aspects of your life. It’s time to make the switch from hard to smart work this year.
Family And Friends
Family will continue to be the foremost priority. I’ll continue to don my maternal side for my mother and daughter, and be there entirely for them. Two different ages, two different demands, but they need me the most. Of course, the men in my life will also matter. They’ll need me as much as I need and depend on them.
Friendships are important. I’m glad I could maintain some great friendships, even with some of them being in distant lands. I met a few friends last year post the pandemic, and can’t wait to meet more in 2023 when they’re in town.
My social life slowly started opening up after my mom’s chemotherapy ended in June last year. It’s been rejuvenating, catching up on connections post the pandemic.
2022 Lessons
I’ve learned that as much as we can plan things, there are many factors outside our control. Sometimes, they help us. Sometimes we think they don’t. Eventually, we realise even it seemed certain situations might have even traumatised us, they actually helped us in the bigger picture of life. I take solace in the fact there’s a higher force in play who has our back in all situations.
At the end of 2021, I’d said how I’d realised it was important to be kind to those who’ve been unkind to me.
At the end of 2022, I want to let go of all things fake. From being truly honest with oneself—letting go of habits and tendencies that don’t serve me any good, and even connections that aren’t true.
It doesn’t mean you’re any less kind, but you only have so much capacity and you can only give so much of yourself to others. So, why not be true and fully present to only a few and do it well? So, that might look like cutting down on time spent on social media and feeling the need to chase metrics of likes, shares and engagements.
In a nutshell, to be honest with oneself. Be true to you. There’s nothing to prove to anyone else.
2023, I give you my word.
My word for 2023 is “Surrender”.
On that note, here’s wishing you a happy, safe, and prosperous 2023! Signing off with this Camila Cabello’s song, Bam Bam because 2022, despite the heartaches, scares, and tough lessons, you’ve still been kind.
* This blog post is a part of the #LetsSayHello2023 blogging activity by Swarnali Nath.
Dear Tina, your words resonate with my unspoken thoughts in such a way that remind me we have some connection, for sure. How gracefully you have written this post. From describing aunty’s health condition, your career choice, your self-care activities, and balancing everything in between, every bit of this piece is oozing with your conviction, courage, and calmness. For me, the new year also started with a note of surrender. I believe 2023 will be kinder and brighter for you. Wishing you a gracious 2023!!
Life can be quite painful sometimes. Hope your mom is better now. May 2023 bring a lot of cheer and blessings.
To read the stories of fighters is always more inspirational than any self help books. You and your mother are fighters. I feel so empowered to see your achievement and at the same time happy too.
Your story resonates with me too Tina, especially about staying afloat day by day and doing work. Balancing personal and family commitments as well as professional ones. So happy for you that you have chosen self care and aunty’s health as your priority. Hope she is better now
Hi Tina
Kudos to you for braving a tumultuous time with courage and grace. I wish your mother good health in days to come. You’ve written some lovely pieces in 2022, few of which I read online. I’ve always appreciated your forthright views in writing and with your words balance and surrender I am sure you will ace the coming year with a beautiful combination of family, self and work. Wishing you a fulfilling 2023.
Such a straight from the heart post Tina, I am so glad aunty is out of it and will be in perfect health soon. You have been thru enough and this too shall pass. Personally no matter how much you work love reading you always
Dear Tina,
First of all a very happy new year!! Kudos to you for facing a challenging phase in your life with such a courage. Proud of you!!
I am sure now when you look back, you must be surprised to see how far you have come. I say that life. It throws challenges at us but God gives us the strength to face them. It just that we have to believe in ourself and the supreme power.
More power to you!!
Tina, let’s me first start off by saying that I love the articles written by you. You hammer home your point so well.
Coming to your post, tight hugs to you for facing a tough 2022 and still being full of grace and gratitude. It is very easy to slip into self-pity mode.
Here’s wishing you a happy and fruitful 2023
Wishing your mom the best of health in 2023 and always. I have always loved reading your posts and admired your opinions and how you put them forth in a no nonsense manner. This post was the same. Balance, self care, family and above all gratitude. Kudos to your spirit
First, wishing that your mom has a painless and healthy year ahead. You are right when you say you are grateful for the year. Indeed, you are lucky and blessed that your mom is with you and you get to tell her again and again how much you love and cherish her. I lost both my husband and my son without even a goodbye, and it still rankles. I think you are in Hyderabad and it would be awesome to catch up sometime.
First of all, I’m so happy Aunty is well now, even though she might take a while to get to normal completely. You’ve been very brave, Tina! I know how crushing it is to see your Mom’s deteriorate, but hey, she’s with you and that matters the most. I like your word of the year. Surrender we must, to new life, new experiences and indeed God’s plan will be great for us.
It was so nice to see the pic of mom in the post . I wish her the best of health this year and may she come back stronger than ever. Tina, I salute your courage to keep going in these tough times. My father had an cardiac surgery last year, so I understand how tough these situations are. May there be more reasons to be happy and let there be more smiles in your life. Wishing you a fabulous year ahead 🌸.
Hope this year is better for you, Tina. You’ve been so resilient. More power to your mom too. Beautiful post.
The dreaded C word. I can totally understand your state of mind. You have been resilient. Hope 2023 brings better news. Love the concept of Balance. Balance is absolutely the key word. Keep up your good work Tina
Sreeparna
True we dont need to prove ourselves to anybody. May you more of what gives you happiness. Wishing you a great 2023 ahead.
Hey Tina, my mom caught COVID in early 2022 during the third wave and the last year started on a heavy note for me. Then she was going through a urine infection that was getting severe when we discovered that she had got cancerous lumps in her urinary bladder. Luckily it was at its first stage and cured correctly. But the emotional baggage we all were carrying with us was beyond comparison.
When I read your post, I realised that life gives us many situations to test our patience.
All the best for 2023.
It is in times like these that we truly learn what matters more in our life, leading us to re-prioritise everything. This was beautifully written. I hope you are able to achieve the balance you are seeking in the coming year.
The dreadful C word I know how it feels . My mom too had it couple of years back. Kudos to your courage and the balance you maintained between work and family. Wishing you all the happiness and health in 2023 for you and your family.
I am absolutely in awe of your will power and the ability to see everything in light. You have bared your emotions in this post and it really inspires your readers to be hopeful, to see the power of prayers and realise the importance of our families and loved ones. I really hope and pray that your mom recovers soon and I get to read about her having a gala time with you all. Lots of love and luck to you in achieving everything on the personal and professional front. Wish you a very happy new year!
Your post touched a deep chord inside. Most of what you said, I have felt at one point or another in the last few years. I suppose that is getting mature in a way. Life teaches us all the same things – those of us who are able to accept and learn from them remain blessed and grateful.
Thank you for sharing your deeper thoughts and fears and wishing your mom a healthy 2023.
This is another inspirational post. You have mentioned valid points that we should follow regularly. Wish you all the best in your future endeavors.
You are doing a great, challenging phase in your life with such courage. Love your spirit. and wish you could the best out of 2023. Having a good balance is all that’s needed.